Discussion Questions
The speaker keeps returning to the phrase “our life is not our own” as a foundation for “good church life”; what specific areas did he name where this truth “expands” over time, and where do you most resist that expansion in your current season? JumpstartAnother way to ask: He says “our life is not our own” should spread into more parts of our lives over time. What areas did he say it should spread into, and where do you push back the most right now?
He quotes, “Words tell a story, and actions reveal the truth,” then asks, “What are the words… the story that you’re telling?”—what “story” does your life actually tell when your weekly actions are examined, and what would need to change for your words and actions to align? JumpstartAnother way to ask: If your weekly actions told a story about what you really believe, what story would they tell? What would need to change so your actions match your words?
The speaker claims “people don’t change unless they either hear themselves or see themselves,” and ties this to examining ourselves before communion; what practices could help a church become the kind of community where people actually “see and hear themselves” without becoming defensive or performative? JumpstartAnother way to ask: He says people change when they “see” or “hear” themselves, and connects this to examining ourselves before communion. What habits could help your church do that in a helpful way without people getting defensive or fake?
He contrasts modern Christians (whose “actions fall way below our words”) with early Christians described through *Martyrs’ Mirror* whose actions “went before them”; what do you think early Christians assumed Christianity would cost them in daily life that many modern believers assume it should not cost? JumpstartAnother way to ask: Early Christians expected following Jesus to cost them something, even in daily life. What kinds of costs do you think they expected that many Christians today don’t expect?
When he says churches may pursue “greatness in place of faithfulness,” and even calls greatness-chasing “worthless in God’s kingdom,” what modern church metrics or personal ambitions does that critique expose, and how would “faithful over a little” reshape what your group celebrates? JumpstartAnother way to ask: He warns that churches can chase “greatness” instead of faithfulness. What church numbers or personal goals does that challenge, and how would “faithful over a little” change what your group celebrates?
Mutual submission is framed as “preferring one another,” stepping back so someone else is put forward; what would mutual submission concretely look like in decisions, conflicts, and preferences in your church—and what does that reveal about God’s priorities for unity? JumpstartAnother way to ask: Mutual submission means choosing to put others first. What would that look like in real church decisions and conflicts, and what does it show about what God cares about for unity?
He observes that many “individualistic Christians” do “great things for God” but “can’t get along in a church,” and says without mutual submission unity is “impossible”; what kinds of “always something wrong” thinking have you seen (or practiced), and how does it limit what a united church could do? JumpstartAnother way to ask: He says some Christians do big things but can’t get along in church, and unity is impossible without mutual submission. What “there’s always something wrong” attitudes have you seen in yourself or others, and how do they block unity?
The “limp mode” illustration for unforgiveness is vivid: “you’re in gear, but you’re worthless… a danger zone”; where have you seen unforgiveness create spiritual “limp mode” in a person or community, and what would “forgive quickly” look like without turning forgiveness into a “massive, long, drawn-out, complicated affair”? JumpstartAnother way to ask: He compares unforgiveness to being stuck in “limp mode,” where you’re moving but not healthy. Where have you seen unforgiveness do that to someone or a group, and what would it look like to forgive quickly without making it a long, complicated process?
He calls forgiveness a “currency” and even a “privilege,” warning from Hebrews that bitterness can “defile many” because bitter people “puke on everybody”; what would it mean for forgiveness to become normal, frequent “currency” among you, and what conversations would need to happen to stop bitterness from spreading through families and friendships? JumpstartAnother way to ask: He says forgiveness should be like a normal “currency,” and bitterness can spread and harm many people. What would it look like for forgiveness to be common in your group, and what talks need to happen to stop bitterness from spreading in families and friendships?
In mercy, patience, and hospitality, he emphasizes measurable reciprocity (“the measure you give is the measure you will receive”), the “God of patience,” and hospitality “without grumbling” (to saints and to strangers); which of these three virtues most confronts your current habits with time, money, emotional energy, and comfort—and what specific weekly changes would prove your life is “not your own”? JumpstartAnother way to ask: He focuses on mercy, patience, and hospitality without complaining. Which one challenges your use of time, money, emotions, or comfort the most, and what weekly changes would show you really believe “your life is not your own”?