"A Lover of Hospitality" by Mary Ann Brechbill | KFW 2024

Lesson Transcript

Jesus said, "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind." This is the first and great commandment, and the second is like unto it, "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." Loving God and loving others are the two greatest commandments. And we all have sinned and come short of the glory of God. I just encourage us today, be strong where it matters. Loving God, loving people.

I've had many teachers in my life in the area of hospitality, so what I share today are things that have been taught to me, mostly by example. Be a lover of hospitality. In Titus 1, we read a list of should-nots. Not self-willed, not soon angry, not given to wine, no striker, not given to filthy lucre, but a lover of hospitality. Now, isn't that interesting?

On the heels of saying not given to filthy lucre, which is money, but a lover of hospitality, if we are given to hoarding or loving money, it will be more difficult to be a generous hostess. Food prices are at an all-time high, and it does cost money to feed people. A lover of hospitality. When I look at the word hospitality, I see the word hospital. According to the Webster Dictionary, a hospital is a stopping place for travelers.

A place that cares for people too old, or too sick, or too poor to care for themselves. That's the old definition of a hospital. And hospitality comes from the word hospital. Luke 13:12, "When you make a dinner, call not thy friends nor brother, neither thy kinsmen, nor thy rich neighbors, lest they also bid thee again, and a recompense be made thee; but when thou makest a feast, call the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind." Sounds like a hospital.

And thou shalt be blessed, for they cannot recompense thee; for thou shalt be recompensed at the resurrection of the just. This is what Jesus was teaching while he was dining in the house of a chief Pharisee, and one of the guests responds by saying, "Blessed is he that shall eat bread in the kingdom of God." I believe that he was able to catch a glimpse by faith. That perfect hospitality will be exemplified at the marriage supper of the Lamb. All our little efforts are just a foretaste.

Just a little imitating of what it will be like to be seated at the table. Where Jesus will be the perfect host. Even though we will never be the perfect hostess, we can practice on people. As if they were an angel, or as if they were Jesus himself. We must not stop doing hospitality because we don't do a very good job. We make mistakes, we burn food, we try bad recipes, the bread flops, and we say something we shouldn't have said. Our children embarrass us.

But we just never get better at anything without practice. I encourage you ladies, just keep on practicing. What is it about hospitality that ministers to us? Why do we like when someone's home feels like a hospital to our souls? Hospitality meets some very basic desires. And needs. Maybe our guests need a safe place to cry. Maybe our guests need a good laugh for once. We all like to be fed. We like to be cared for. We like encouragement. We like to feel valued. We like to eat someone else's cooking.

We like to learn other ways to do hospitality. Hospitality is way more than pushing a plate of food in front of someone. I read a secular quote recently. It said, "Hope divided by hunger equals happiness." I think what that's trying to say is the more hopeful and less hungry you are, the happier you become. When we are hungry, we just think about that hunger. Hungry doesn't just mean for food. And from a spiritual point of view, I would like to think about hope divided by hunger equals happiness.

What are some of the things that we hunger for? We hunger for food. We hunger for intimacy and friends. We hunger for acceptance. We hunger for information. We hunger for answers. We hunger and thirsty after righteousness. We hunger for truth. We hunger for love. I encourage us, when we have guests, remember that they are hungry for more than just food.

Recently, I was at my daughter's who had just had another baby, and I had the meal prepared, and I called the little two-year-old and I said, "Is your belly hungry?" And she looked at me so funny and she said, "My mouth is hungry." You know, sometimes we think we know what's hungry, but it's something else that the person is actually needing. Hope divided by hunger equals happiness. We want our guests to go home less hungry. More hopeful. And happier than what they were when they came.

If Christ abides in our home, hope resides there as well. Hope divided by hunger equals happiness. There should be purpose and goals in everything that we do. And we often fall short of our goals. But without vision and purpose, we perish. If we want our guests less hungry and more hopeful and happier when they leave our home, we must do intentional hospitality. We need to stay focused on the guest. It's nice when we know something about our guests before they come. Are they restricted in what they can eat?

Do they have allergies? Are they sensitive to smells? What do they love? Would they enjoy a candle, or flowers, or a fancy table, or would they feel more comfortable with just the plain Jane table? And God loves to send us surprises. I have prayed many prayers in my basement. Looking at all the jars of food and wondering what I'm going to feed my guests that came for the afternoon and now it's supper time. And you know, God can help us be creative. And I just encourage you, just pray about everything.

And, um, just be grateful that somebody wanted to come to your house and be grateful that you have food in jars or food in the cupboard that you can share. Sometimes God sends us unexpected guests or strangers. And sometimes it just feels like a pop quiz, like God's just testing us, like, what are we going to do with this package? Several weeks ago, I knew that I had an empty, quiet house for one hour.

And I decided, this is my hour to sit down with a notebook and pencil, and I'm going to write down some notes on lover of hospitality. And the doorbell rang. It was an elderly lady who just happened to stop by to visit my 80-year-old aunt who lives with us. My aunt had gone off to the library. And the lady just stayed there. And I realized that if I would invite her in, she would come in. But I needed this hour to write my notes on being a lover of hospitality.

I confess with deep regret that I did not invite her in. It wasn't until I had shut the door and sat down again with my hospitality notes that God opened my eyes to what I had just done. She was the very person who God had sent to my door. She was looking for a hospital. She was poor. Her very, very old father had just died several weeks ago. She would not be in a condition to return any favors. She was hungry for friendship. She was hungry for care. She was hungry for a listening ear. But I had notes to write.

Bue. We serve a gracious, forgiving God, and sometimes He gives us another opportunity to do better. He is my God of mercy and forgiveness. And yes, God sent that woman back again. And I was given another opportunity for hospitality. I would like to talk about the word hospital. There are many different kinds of hospitals. Each one has their own specific strength. There are many different restaurants, and each one has their specialties.

When our homes become hospitality centers, it's sort of like a combination of a restaurant and a hospital. With no charge. The service is freely given, and the food is freely given. No hospital has the wherewithal to be good at everything. No restaurant has the wherewithal to make the best food in every category. But they all have a strength. Some hospitals are known for excellent heart care, or maternity care, or NICU, or they have a reputable surgeon.

Or they may be one of those rare hospitals with a reputation for good food. Back in April, I was with my daughter in a hospital in the NICU with her baby. And that hospital was in North Carolina. They had the best food. And I mentioned to the nurse one day, I said, "Your food here is so delicious." And she said, "We pride ourselves in our good food in this hospital." And she said, "We are known as a hospital with good food." They were known by that strength.

Some restaurants are known for their French fries, or their good coffee, or their tender steaks, or their chips and salsa. But no hospital has the best of everything, and no restaurant has the best of everything. And no home that practices hospitality has the best of everything. We don't need to be intimidated by the Joneses' hospitality. God has given each of our homes a strength or a talent. It is that strength or talent that we can offer and share with the people that God sends to our homes.

The strength is the gift of God. He wants us to use it for His glory and not be embarrassed by the fact that we just have one strength. And the Joneses have many. If God has given us just one thing to share, we are called to share it. And do it without apology. Years ago, we had unexpected company show up, and we had no butter in the house. And I thought, well, I guess I can make a meal without butter. And I did, and we were eating, and the wife asked for butter. I felt so badly about that for a long time.

But God has given us the gift of the Holy Spirit that brings scriptures to our remembrance. And I was reminded that when Jesus fed the multitude, and He served fish and bread, there was no mention of butter being served. And I was comforted. There is a word from scripture for every dilemma that we may find ourselves in. God's word can bring rest to a situation. We have the gift of the Holy Spirit to bring scriptures to our remembrance. I have learned so much by receiving hospitality from others.

When my husband preached revival messages in other communities and other states, the Lord used many hospitality centers to teach me. And I tried to learn how to create our own hospital-restaurant combination in our own home. We were welcomed into homes where we enjoyed many strengths. The Anabaptist women are some of the best cooks in the world. We were humbled by people's kindnesses and sacrifice that they made on our behalf. People show love in many different ways. One is not better than the other.

How you choose to love people that come to your home or your hospital is your prerogative. We can only draw from the talents or strengths that we have been given. We had two almost identical experiences in two different states that we will never forget. At both places, we were visiting in an unfamiliar church. We were invited to a home for the noon meal. We didn't know the family very well who was the one for hospitality. Both places were in a long lane. And the houses sat on the top of a hill.

In both incidences, as we slowly made our way up that long lane, with our insecurities stalking us, the man of the home was standing on the front porch, just waving us in. I can't tell you how wonderful that felt and how healing that felt. That is the warmest welcome that anyone could give to someone. I will never forget it. I remember thinking, if the food is burnt, it doesn't matter. I could live on that warm welcome for a long, long time. But that isn't everybody's strength, and it isn't everybody's style.

And most of us probably won't be able to talk our husbands into that one. That was the strength of that hospitality center. Whenever I recall being in either one of those homes, I don't remember the food. I only remember the warm welcome. Another delightful experience, um, that we had, my husband was having a Sunday evening service at a church. And after the service, um, the husband of another family came up to my husband and he said, "We want you to come to our house for oatmeal cookies.

We have a wonderful oatmeal cookie recipe, and we want to share our cookies with you." When we arrived, they seated us at the kitchen table. The table was wiped clean. We were served water while the hostess slowly baked her famous oatmeal cookies. While we visited and drank our water, we enjoyed the wonderful aroma of baking oatmeal cookies. We hadn't had supper that evening. And it's already like 10 o'clock, 10:30 in the evening.

After the first tray was baked, I assumed the hostess would start serving the cookies. But she didn't. She just popped the next tray in the oven, and we sat there smelling those wonderful oatmeal cookies. She acted like she wasn't even tempted to eat a cookie. It was getting later and later, and we were getting hungrier and hungrier for oatmeal cookies. By now, there was no other food in the world that held the appeal of those delicious-smelling oatmeal cookies.

And we watched ravenously as the hostess arranged her prized oatmeal cookies on a beautiful platter. And she slowly and graciously just set the platter in the center of the table. And the husband said, "Then shall we pray?" After prayer, we enjoyed those oatmeal cookies in a way that we had never enjoyed oatmeal cookies. It was the perfect meal. We didn't even wish for milk to go with the cookies. We were so hungry for oatmeal cookies. I would give that family a five-star rating on hospitality.

They knew how to capitalize on one thing. They were humble enough to share one thing. They were brilliant enough to know that if we were hungry enough and enjoyed the aroma of oatmeal cookies long enough, we really wouldn't be wishing for anything other than oatmeal cookies. They never apologized or explained why they only served oatmeal cookies. It really was all we wanted. I have such fond memories of sitting in their kitchen at that empty table, drinking water, waiting for the cookies.

If you can bake cookies and serve water, you are without excuse when it comes to hospitality. Another memorable experience that I had, and I learned about hospitality in this one also, um, it was my birthday, and my sister, who happens to be sitting here, invited me over for supper. She knew my favorite food was hoagies. I think she told me there might be hoagies. And we pulled in the driveway, and her and her husband walked to the car.

And her husband has this string around his neck with this card, you know, flowing as he's walking toward me. And I realized it was one of the funny cards I had sent him on his last birthday. And I thought, okay, we are in for a party. And we were. They invited us to their backyard, and we sat there. And there was this line strung around the patio, and on the line was birthday cards held on with wash pins. I was like, wow, that's interesting decorations, but.

Found out later she had told all the guests to bring a card, and then they had to hang it on the line. They could bring several cards if they wanted to. And we ate our hoagies, and then they said that they gave me a basket. I had to need I needed to take all the cards off the line, and I needed to read all the cards out loud. They know that I love buying funny cards and sending it to people, so they told the guests, buy all the funny cards that you can. And then I was going to have to read them out loud.

We laughed so hard that night and had so much fun. On the way home, I told my husband, I feel like the richest woman in the world. I didn't get any gifts, but I had all these cards. My sister knew I was going through a hard time, and I needed a good laugh, and she gave me one. You know, God is the God of creation, and if you want to know what to do for your guests, you pray about it. God will help you be creative. I mean, some of it will sometimes feel like, uh, that's out of my comfort zone. You know what?

If you go out of your comfort zone, you're going to have a good evening. Many times when I'm preparing food for company and praying over my food, by the way, I always try to pray over my food when I have company. I've had that many flops and tried that many bad recipes that I know that God can redeem any horrible thing that I make. And so I pray over the food.

And while I'm praying, I often think about the possibility of an angel at our table and how wonderful that would be if God would send an angel to our table sometimes. Several years ago, a stranger was passing through our area, and one of his friends gave him our address. They said, go to the shop and ask for Donnie Breckville. When you tell him who sent you, he will laugh. But he will invite you in for lunch, and it will be a good lunch. Donnie brought a stranger with him when he came in for lunch that day.

While we were eating, our visitor said, it's just like I was told it would be. I told Donnie who sent me, and Donnie laughed. And then Donnie invited me for lunch, and it's pretty good. We had such a delightful time with that stranger. After he had gone, we felt like the Lord had sent someone really special to our home. Was it an angel? He continues to return to our home almost yearly. He always brings encouragement and a blessing into our home.

I'll never forget the one evening he was in our home, and he explained the verse that he shares on his travels around the world. Christ in us, the hope of glory. And that verse is so precious to me. Three years ago, we were planning a wedding for our daughter, and she said, I have no grandpa. I want a grandpa at my wedding, and I want to invite our stranger. I want him to sit with the family. It took some doings to figure out how to make connections. He has no phone or permanent address. He came to the wedding.

He was no longer a stranger. He more than filled in for a grandpa. Did the Lord send an angel? God knows. We do know that God is a God of compensation for every loss that we have. When there are no grandpas, God sends compensation. I encourage you, welcome this stranger in. It will cost you something, but God overcompensates for our losses, and He gives gifts in ways that you never saw coming. He gives us treasures that money cannot buy.

Another experience that my husband and I had on our 10th anniversary, we went to Colonial Williamsburg. And, um, I think the waitress was trying to find out who we were, where we had come from, whether we worked there. Now, um, and we told her that we're celebrating our 10th anniversary. Well, within minutes, this, um, man in uniform who worked there comes, he pulls up a chair, and he has his fiddle, and he plays a love song to us. It was a specialty of that restaurant.

I don't remember what we ate that night, but we treasured. The rest of the people dining there were subjected to our little love song, but that didn't matter. We loved it. It was such an unexpected gift. I encourage you to contemplate what is a strength that God gave you for your hospital restaurant hospitality center. Do you have one specialty food that you love to make? Let that be your talent. Is there a cookie that you like to make? Just make sure your guests are good and hungry before you serve it.

Keep a freezable casserole in the freezer or a frozen pizza all the time because you never know when God is going to send the stranger or an angel to your door. My mother might, well, I should say my dad, he had an uncanny ability of just dragging the people in. He just loved when company came. And my mother was, I have never seen my mother flustered because of company, but she always had a stash of cereal available.

And many, many times, the guests sat around a table and they brought in the cereal and we had cereal. And everybody seemed to just enjoy that. We are without excuse. One of the attributes of the Proverbs 31 woman is that she strengtheneth her arms. So you could, like, practice doing this when your guests arrive. Pray about ways to give a special evening to someone. Maybe your family is better at singing than cooking. Have a song prepared to share. The song will be the treasure that they take home with them.

Many times, the way something is given is more powerful than the gift itself. There was a lady in our community that opened up, um, part of her house and turned it into a little tea room. And a lot of the community people would plan parties and, and reserve that room for, for a birthday party or something. She just made ordinary food, but she had such an unordinary way of serving it.

I mean, she would come in with this fancy tray with these tiny little, um, bowls on it, and individually she would go around and she'd be like, tomato bisque, tomato bisque, as if it was the most wonderful thing you could eat. And it was basically thickened tomato soup, but she called it tomato bisque. And it was great. You know, if we act excited about what we're sharing, the guests will love it. You can serve tomato bisque. You know, the server has a tremendous influence over the meal.

If you are stressed, your guests are going to be stressed. If you're having fun, they're going to have fun. If you're happy to see them, they'll be happy to see you. Maybe the strength that we have to share is our children. I loved when guests delighted in our funny children. Many times people would go home and said, say something like, oh, we were so glad to laugh at your table, laugh with you over your children's funny little remarks.

One time, um, this was years ago, there was pretty many dating couples at that time. So we decided we're going to invite all the dating couples in. And we wanted to, um, we planned different games, and then I wanted the children to do a little performance for them. So, and I give some of the credit to my, my son. He sort of did the practicing with them. And I remember our youngest daughter was just like two or three, so they, they had brought in a stool for her to stand on.

And we had, we set up the table in our living room so they couldn't see what's happening in the kitchen and all the food was served by our children. And then at the very end, they wanted to sing a song to the dating couples. So the children came in and they all had a kettle or lids for the, they, for their own musical instruments. And they sang, um, you are my cupcake, yummy, yummy yumkin, you're my sweetie pie or something like that. And, and they, the children had so much fun clanging their musical instruments.

And to this day, when I meet some of those couples, you know, they're all married now, and they're like, we just enjoyed that song that your children sang to us. We were in a home recently, and I was entertained the whole meal by the funny little girl that I was privileged to sit beside. I enjoyed visiting with her so much that I can't even tell you what we ate that evening. I do remember enjoying watching her be very finicky about her food and peeling off anything that would have taken effort to chew.

I saw her peel grapes and things that I never saw peeled before. And she enjoyed her food morsel by morsel, and I enjoyed the entertainment. Sitting beside her was such a delight, and it felt like a gift that was orchestrated by our host and hostess. Allow your guests to receive a gift that you are responsible for giving. And sometimes, you know, it might not be anything they can hold in their hand, but give them something.

There was a lady in our community, whenever she had guests, she would give the wife a white lacy handkerchief, and she always had something for the men too. And it was just, people loved it. There are many ways to do hospitality. We have been guests at long tables with, or like a guest at a long table with many guests around it, with lots of conversation, lots of laughter, lots of good food.

One time we received an invitation, and assuming it would be a party because we were told not to bring our children, we were the only guests, and they served us an amazing banquet. I will never forget the banquet, and I will never forget how it felt to be the only guest. On the way home, my husband and I purposed in our hearts that we wanted to bless people in that way sometime.

I mean, there's, if there's something delightful about a big table full of people, but to be the only guest, Jesus said, behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hear my voice and open the door, I will come into him and will sup with him and he with me. When we are alone with God and we get all the love and all the care with alone with God, there's something really precious about that. But then there's something really precious about communion when the whole church partakes of bread and the cup.

There's just many ways to enjoy hospitality. So, what is your hospitality temperature? If your doormat could speak, would it say, welcome or go away? Hospitality is a muscle that can always be strengthened. Remember, hope divided by hunger equals happiness. May we continue to offer hope in Jesus for the soul and food to feed the body so that when our guests say goodbye, they have more hope and less hunger and more happiness. I encourage you to be a lover of hospitality.

It's, it's actually really enjoyable if it's not looked at as a duty. This is something we love to do because we love people. And may we together look forward to the glorious day when we will be invited to sit at the marriage supper of the Lamb and Christ Himself will serve us. And we will experience perfect hospitality in all its glory. Until then, keep loving God with all your heart and your soul and your mind and loving others as yourself. Be strong where it matters most, loving God and loving people.

And God bless you as you, um, become more of a lover of hospitality. Well, thank you, Marianne. We have been given much to chew on, to digest, and to think over and see how God wants us to have our hospital centers. That idea is refreshing and yet gives such purpose that we can meet the needs, however they may come to us in our homes. I think we'll proceed with the answer, a question and answer session. And if any of you have questions, just raise your hand.

We will bring the mic to you, and then everyone can hear your question. And maybe, Marianne, I'll ask you to come up. We have a clip-on mic for you if you would like to respond to the questions. Is there someone that has a question, something you thought about, or maybe you have a testimony that you would like to share with our group today? Thank you very much, Marianne, for sharing your own stories because I'm sure there's many of us that have the burnt roast story or the knock on the door when you are not ready.

Um, and my mind went to last Saturday. My son called and said, "Hey, can I bring a friend for lunch?" And I said, "Sure. I was just going to warm up what was in the refrigerator." Um, and I thought, well, it should reach. But at quarter to 12, someone else showed up at the door to talk to my husband, and they stayed on and on. And I was like, um, this is not going to work. So I had to go into Fast Track and plan something totally different. All in all, at 12:30, we ate a good lunch. Thank the Lord.

Is there anyone that has a question or something you'd like to share? Back in the back. Okay. Um, I would just love to hear practical ways that you, um, like, make a home inviting as far as when someone walks in or like ways that maybe you felt welcomed. Um, I guess like to, yeah, a cozy feeling as you walked in, an inviting feeling. So just any practical tips on that? Well, we're not always company ready.

And if we have invited company ahead of time, then I think the expectations are probably higher and they expect you to have maybe the toys picked up. But if somebody just shows up and you didn't know they were coming, um, you know, we actually do live in our house. Uh, I felt like I was tested on every front with hospitality since, um, I agreed to do this.

Just this week, there was a couple, a family biking by in the evening, and it was one of those evenings I thought, if I don't water the flowers, it's going to get dark. And so we just, I, we just walked away from the kitchen table. The dishes were still on the table. The counter was just full of dirty dishes because we had baked cookies. And the place was just a mess.

And, and this couple, they drove in and they had two little children and we were like, "Oh, sure, just come on in." So the two little children were really friendly. So I started playing with them and I got toys out. And the little girl looked at me and she goes, "You really like children." I said, "I do like children." And then they were ready to leave and the little boy said to his dad, he said, "What about them cookies over there?" You know.

And I thought, you know what, I was so glad that I didn't even have to apologize the way the house looked. And it was bad. But the children picked up that I loved them and they noticed the cookies and I wouldn't have even thought to offer them. So, you know, if we can just be okay with whatever and love the people, you know, I think maybe if that the messier the house, the more you just love well so that they might forget what they saw.

Just love them extra special and then they'll remember the warmth and whatever and forget what it looked like. As our daughters got older, they were more and more concerned with what the house looked like when people came, especially unexpected visitors. And I would often ask them, I said, um, do you remember ever going to someone's house and, and you saw dirt that you actually wished you hadn't come?

They were like, "No." So do you really think people are going to feel that way if they come and everything's not perfect? Are they going to wish they hadn't come because it wasn't perfect? And no. So, yeah, just how we need to help our children in this, especially when they're teenagers. They, it's really hard, but we can only do so much in a day. And if we have, you know, done what we could do and this is the way it is, this is the way it is. I don't have a question. I just want to say thank you.

I was deeply convicted. Um, for years we had a revolving door at our house with people from all walks of life. But in the last couple of years, I've been weary. Years ago as young believers, my husband and I prayed for the gift of hospitality. We've read the verses on it and, um, asked the Lord to give us that gift and He answered it.

And we've had many, many meals of simple food and my husband's an amazing chef and we've had a lot of meals of amazing food, um, because of his giftings and God has answered that prayer. But today I've, I realized that there's a, I guess you could say a renewal that has needed to happen in my heart. So thank you. I really, really enjoyed, and I enjoyed your humor. We're a family that loves to laugh. Um, but yeah, I just want to say thank you for being faithful to the message that God has given you.

And I would love to visit sometime. Please do come. If it has to be perfect, give me a call ahead of time. If you're okay about a mess, just come on over. I'll see if I can crank out some oatmeal cookies. Thank you so much for your honest story in the beginning. I really appreciate honesty. Um, whenever I, I wasn't born and raised Anabaptist and I wasn't expected to host. So when I moved to this area, it was like, what? Uh, I was like, and we're a small family. So I'm like, all right, this is a team effort.

We're all going to like gather around and we're going to use this opportunity to strengthen our family. So it's a, it's definitely in my family, a team to make it everything ready because the expectation of one person, it could be overwhelming. And my husband told me one thing. He's like, if you're not doing anything with joy, don't stop. He's like, stop. Don't do it. It just won't happen. So we have this, um, contract, if you will, that's saying if it's enough, it's like, I'm not feeling real joyful.

And then it's like, okay, we got to like do something different. So really being honest with yourself, setting expectations and realizing that it's a group, you know, you're a family and that the kids can pick up the toys or, you know, who cares about the toys? You know, frankly, when I go into a home and if it's too perfect, I get creeped, creeped out. I really do. I mean, if your house is so perfect and everything's dusted, I'm like, oh wow, I can't live up to that and I, I'm not feeling real comfortable.

So honesty, you know, being honest with yourself, honest with your partner, honest with your family, and being joyful, um, is one of my recommendations if I can give that, um, to anybody. Thank you so much for your honesty. Well, you just reminded me of another story. And this was when I was on my journey, when I still had young children and, you know, I, I, I felt like I just needed to lower my own expectations of what needed to be done before a company comes.

And so I didn't get to the flower beds and they were weedy and the company came. And later on in the visit, the, the lady asked me, she's like, "Are you depressed?" And I said, "No." She said, "Well, whenever I drive in somebody's place and see weeds in their flower bed, I just assume they're depressed." And I was starting to feel good about being chill about having weeds in my flower bed and she assumed I was depressed.

So it is good to discuss things with your visitors so that, you know, they don't feel bad that they came in your depression. But, you know, it, it gave us something to talk about and it was interesting to see life through her eyes. She just, you know, she just always felt like, because when she can't get her work done, then she goes into depression. So she just assumed that I was probably depressed because she saw my weedy flower bed. So, um, a lot of answers of, yeah, there's been, uh, lots to, for me to grow.

We, um, face that a lot, like, um, company and sometimes don't know exactly how to go about it. It can get quite overwhelming at times. And so much often, like night company or whatever. I just wonder, like, is there a place of, um, sometimes when it's getting so busy or overwhelming, like to, to say no, this time it won't work out without feeling guilty or like, is, yeah, how, how do you answer a question like that? Is there times to say no?

Or is it just again and again, just showing love without, um, yeah, disputing and all of that? Or, yeah, not quite sure if it makes sense, but, um, I feel like sometimes it can get very overwhelming and, and quite often and close, um, in the row or whatever. And that it's very overwhelming or I feel like, um, it's more than I can handle or how do you, yeah, go about that? Well, I mean, we all have limitations. There is only so much we can do.

And I don't think we need to feel guilty if, if, you know, I can't do that. But, yeah, make sure you look at your heart and, you know, is that what it is or would I just really rather not be bothered? I remember another time we had overnight company coming and our upstairs bathroom was really in bad shape. And, you know, the linoleum was rolling in and, and I just, I asked the Lord to help me to not apologize or be ashamed. Just, you know, this is, this is the way the, the situation was.

And the next morning at the breakfast table, this man said, "I just want to tell you how at home we feel. We just, my wife and I both said, we're so happy to see your rolled up linoleum. And it just makes us feel so at home. And we were glad everything wasn't perfect. So, you know, God redeems things for us when we, you know, are a little worried about, not sure what to do about that. But God, God is, God is with us. He's in this. And if He, He knows our hearts, if we're doing our best, you know.

Okay, so I'm a bit of an introvert, but I'm sometimes an extrovert. And I have always loved hosting people, but I don't have a lot of people in my circle to host. So God gave me my husband. He finds people. I don't know where he finds some people. In the past couple of years, we've had, I'll come home from work and it's like, "Oh, by the way, the door-to-door salespeople, they were over here and I just invited them for dinner tonight. They'll be here in about 20 minutes." "Oh, okay, sure.

What are we having?" "Oh, no, no, I think you'll get that." "Okay." So we have hosted door-to-door salesmen. Had another couple of individuals. They were riding their bikes near our home. And my husband works from home, so he had seen them and they got to talking and they were willing to help with some of the yard work that we had. And I'm very happy to provide anything I can.

And then my husband's like, "Oh, by the way, they just got out of prison." And at this point, we have young children in the home and I'm like, "Okay, I'm not sure I'm comfortable bringing people into the home that I don't know who. Why are you in prison?" I later found out that it was for murder. Um, so instead of bringing them into the home, because I was not comfortable, I ordered pizza.

We sat out on the patio and they were happy to have people to talk to and who were willing to accept them, even though we didn't know one another. And they actually became part of our lives for probably about 18 months. We would communicate and have them over and provide transportation. But it's my husband inviting and finding people. And it's like, "All right, not a problem. I can do this. And what are we serving?

What's available?" I can't express how much of a blessing and an encouragement and a challenge your message was to me. Um, I'm 19. I've been married for nine, for nine months. And hospitality has been one of those things that I feel like the Lord is calling me to, yet is absolutely not in my nature. Um, I grew up in a big family, so I'm not necessarily a stranger to socializing and chaos. But my husband is an introvert and that has rubbed off on me.

Um, a couple of you have mentioned that your husbands have this knack of bringing home random people. That's my husband. I don't know how many times. Actually, I can. He's brought home a handful of people off the interstate, um, that have broken down, including a Honduran man who couldn't speak a lick of English. We had to communicate with him through Google Translate and that was interesting.

Um, but I think there are a couple of areas the Lord has, has challenged me and chastened me in this is one, not to grumble, even in my spirit, when my husband calls me and says, "Hey, I have this fellow with me." You know, I told him we'd feed him and put him up for the night. And, you know, maybe it was supposed to be a free night and our weeks fill up so fast and a free evening is just, you know, it feels like, like a party to look forward to. And then here's this intruder.

It's like, "Ugh." And it's, the Lord showed me that the spirit of hospitality goes to the very core. It's not just outward, but it is how, what's my gut, my gut response. But also what you said about when my guests are when I'm stressed, my guests are stressed, stressed, and when I'm having fun, they're having fun. That reminded me of one of the only times I've had more than one or two extra people in my home.

Um, randomly, one Sunday afternoon, my husband invited my whole family, which is 11 other people, and his parents and another one of his brothers that has five little girls, um, all over to our house for supper. And it was like four o'clock in the evening and I hadn't had anything planned for supper. And, um, now I was very thankful for this, that my mother and my mother-in-law planned supper and they brought the food. I didn't have to do anything with the food. They just wanted to use my kitchen.

But I found myself kind of resenting the fact that my husband had done this without asking me first. I was not prepared mentally. I was not prepared physically. I was not prepared emotionally for this. Um, and I, looking back, I think my stress showed, um, more than I, excuse me, more than I realized. And a couple of times, like my, my mom or my mother-in-law would like come over and give me a hug and be like, you know, "It's okay.

It's okay." And I'm, I looking back, I probably showed that I was stressed and out of my comfort zone a lot more than I, um, a lot more than I wanted to be. And yeah, that, the thing about if I'm having fun, they're having fun. Um, I want to, I want to be that way. I want, you know, I don't know how much that spirit carried over into my guests, but that really, really got me. Um, so yeah, thank you for everything that you shared, Marianne. Um, it's a real blessing to me as a new wife and a new hostess.

My husband does the same thing. He brings, um, tattoos and piercings and lots of hair and all kinds of exciting things from stinky locations. And I think it's so very exciting. As Sarah gets older, I get a little bit worried sometimes how to be hospitable when she says, "He doesn't have any pants on." Well, they're just short, honey. Um, so she said he doesn't like being immodest, does he? Anyway, so when Simon brings home Joito, um, he raises dogs, many, many, many dogs inside his house.

And he comes, you know, it's, I can tell, smell. Um, and he sits down in my hardest to clean soft chair. And I say, "Yes, Jesus, you may sit in that nice soft chair. We'll work on cleaning it later." It now has a towel on it. And when Joito comes over, he always leaves food in his plate, just food I've really delicately prepared, lots of it.

And I think, ah, I told Simon, I said, "This makes me feel unloved to have all this good food in his plate." And Simon says, "Just serve it to the chickens in Jesus' name." Um, because Simon loves a joyful wife. So when Joito comes, Joito comes over, then Sarah says, "Oh, Joito's here." And she runs and gets the plate and a spoon and a cup. And so I feel like she's my report card.

If she can do it cheerfully, then I'm, and now, Marianne, if you come to my house, just come with a broom because I haven't learned to keep the floors clean. But I'll be happy if you come. Thanks a lot, dear. And by the way, when you go to her house, she does treat you like an angel. All right. Well, thank you all for sharing your experiences and the things that have really spoken to you in this, uh, topic of hospitality.

I'm sure we could keep going, but, uh, maybe you can keep sharing with each other throughout the afternoon and evening. Uh, I think we'll go ahead and dismiss, but before we do that, it will soon be supper time. So I think we'll close with prayer and include, uh, a prayer for the meal as well. So I'm going to ask those of you who can to stand for our closing prayer. Let's pray.

Our Father, we are so grateful for the way that Your Spirit has moved in our hearts this afternoon, and You have spoken to us of the many ways that You want us to be Your hands and feet to the people around us. We know that You have orchestrated all things to work for Your good, for Your purpose, for our good, and for Your glory. So I just pray that we can put to practice what You are speaking to us about hospitality.

And now, Lord, we thank You too for the, the supper that is prepared, and we pray that Your blessing would be on it and that we would go from here in Your strength. Thank You in Jesus' name. Amen.