Marriage, Divorce, and Adultery

It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

SUMMARY: Moses, a faithful servant of God, allowed the Israelites to divorce their wives because their hearts were hard. But God's plan for marriage was one man and one woman from the beginning. The early Christians differed in how they understood the exception clause in Matthew 5:32. Some early Christians believed that a man was permitted to put away his wife for fornication or adultery. They said this should not be done out of malice or bitterness. Instead, it should be done so that he would not live in agreement with sin, and so that the wrong spouse would be disciplined in hope of leading them to repentance. Some also applied fornication to unlawful marriages; that is, they meant an incestuous marriage, or a marriage made after divorce from the first living spouse. Some did not even mention the exception clause when discussing divorce and remarriage. Elsewhere, Jesus affirmed the one-flesh union. He also affirmed that remarriage is adultery while the original spouse is alive. Therefore, all of the early Christian writers forbid remarriage after divorce. Irenaeus: The Lord also showed that certain commands were given to them by Moses because of their hardness of heart and because they were unwilling to obey. When they said to him, "Why then did Moses command to give a writing of divorcement and to send away a wife?" He said to them, "Because of the hardness of your hearts he permitted these things to you, but from the beginning it was not so." In this way, he showed that Moses was a faithful servant. But he also affirmed one God, who from the beginning made male and female, and he corrected them for being hard-hearted and disobedient. Therefore, they received from Moses this law of divorce, shaped to fit their hard nature. But why do I say these things about the Old Testament? In the New Testament also, the apostles are found doing this same thing for the reason already mentioned. Paul plainly says, "But these things I say, not the Lord." And again, "But this I speak by permission, not by commandment." And again, "Now, as concerning virgins, I have no commandment from the Lord, yet I give my judgment as one that has obtained mercy of the Lord to be faithful." But further, in another place he says, "That Satan not tempt you for your lack of self-restraint." If then, even in the New Testament, the apostles are found giving certain instructions because of human weakness, because some people lack self-control. This is so that such people will not become stubborn and lose all hope of salvation, otherwise they might turn away from God. So it should not surprise us if, in the Old Testament, the same God allowed similar allowances for the good of His people. He drew them forward by means of the rules already mentioned so that they might receive the gift of salvation through them. This happened while they obeyed the Ten Commandments. And as He held them back from sin, they would not return to idolatry or turn away from God, but would learn to love Him with their whole heart.

TATIAN: it was said that the one who divorces his wife should give her a written notice of divorce. But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except because of adultery, has caused her to commit adultery. And whoever marries a woman who has been divorced commits adultery.

TERTULLIAN: Tertullian, Christ forbids divorce. He says, "Whoever puts away his wife and marries another commits adultery, and whoever marries her that is put away from her husband also commits adultery." To forbid divorce, he makes it unlawful to marry a woman who has been put away. Moses, however, allowed repudiation in Deuteronomy: "When a man has taken a wife and has lived with her, and it comes to pass that she finds no favor in his eyes, because he has found unchastity in her, then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and put it in her hand, and send her away out of his house." You see, therefore, that there is a difference between the law and the gospel, between Moses and Christ. To be sure, there is. But then you have rejected that other gospel which testifies to the same truth and the same Christ. There, while forbidding divorce, he has given us an answer to this special question about it. Moses, he says, because of the hardness of your hearts, allowed you to give a bill of divorcement. But from the beginning it was not so. This is because he who had made them male and female had also said, "The two shall become one flesh." What therefore God has joined together, do not let man separate. By this answer to the Pharisees, he both approved the provision of Moses, who was his own servant, and restored the Creator's institution to its original purpose, since he was the Creator's Christ. Since, however, you are to be corrected from the scriptures you have received, I will meet you on your own ground, as if your Christ were mine. When he forbade divorce and at the same time showed the Father, the one who joined male and female, did he not rather release than cancel the law of Moses? But notice this: if this Christ is yours when he teaches against Moses and the Creator, then by the same rule he must be mine if I can show that his teaching is not against them. I say then that there was a condition in the divorce ban he gave. The case is this: a man puts away his wife for the clear purpose of marrying another. His words are: "Whoever puts away his wife and marries another commits adultery, and whoever marries her that is put away from her husband also commits adultery." Put away, that is, for the reason a woman should not be sent away, so that another wife may be gained. For the man who marries a woman who was unlawfully put away is an adulterer, just like the man who marries a woman who is not divorced. The marriage that is not rightly ended is a lasting marriage. Therefore, to marry while the marriage bond is still unbroken is to commit adultery. Since, therefore, his ban on divorce was conditional, he did not forbid it in every case. And what he did not forbid in every case, he allowed in some cases when the reason for his ban is not present. Indeed, his teaching is not against Moses. He partly defends Moses' command. I will not even say he fully confirms it. But if you deny that divorce is ever allowed by Christ, why do you, on your side, destroy marriage? You do this by not joining man and woman, and by not admitting to the sacrament of baptism and of the Eucharist those who have been joined in marriage anywhere else, unless they agree together to reject the fruit of their marriage and so reject the Creator himself. Well then, what is a husband to do in your sect if his wife commits adultery? Should he keep her? But your own apostle, as you know, does not allow the members of Christ to be joined to a harlot. Therefore, when it is rightly deserved, divorce has even in Christ a defender. So Moses, from now on, must be seen as confirmed by him. Moses forbids divorce in the same way Christ does if any unchastity happens in the wife. In the Gospel of Matthew, he says, "Whoever shall put away his wife except for the cause of fornication causes her to commit adultery." The one who marries a woman put away by her husband is also counted equally guilty of adultery. The Creator, however, except because of adultery, does not separate what he himself joined together. And this same Moses, in another place, commanded that the man who married after violence to a young woman should after that not have the power to put away his wife. Now, if a forced marriage made after violence must be permanent, how much more should a voluntary marriage be permanent? One made by agreement. This has the support of the prophet: "Do not forsake the wife of your youth." So you have Christ freely following the Creator's path everywhere, both in allowing divorce and in forbidding it. You also find him guarding marriage no matter which way you try to escape. He forbids divorce when he wants the marriage to be unbroken. He allows divorce when the marriage is stained with unfaithfulness. You should be ashamed when you refuse to join those whom even your Christ has joined. And you should be ashamed again when you separate them without the good reason why your Christ would have them separated. I now have to show where the Lord got this decision and what goal he aimed at. Then it will be even clearer that his purpose was not to cancel the Mosaic command by some suddenly invented rule about divorce. It was not suddenly invented. It had its root in the John the Baptist already mentioned. For John rebuked Herod because he had unlawfully married the wife of his dead brother. She had a daughter by him. The law allowed such a marriage only in the one case where the brother died without children. In that case, the law even required such a marriage, so that by his own brother and from his own wife, offspring might be counted to the dead husband. Because of this rebuke, John was thrown into prison. Finally, by that same Herod, he was even put to death. Therefore, the Lord, after mentioning John and, of course, the event of his death, threw his blame at Herod in the form of condemning unlawful marriages and adultery. He even called an adulterer the man who married a woman who had been put away from her husband. He said this so that Herod's guilt would be even heavier. Herod had taken his brother's wife after she had been released from her husband, not only by divorce but also by death. He was driven by lust, not by the command of the levirate law. For since his brother had left a daughter, marriage with the widow could not be lawful for that very reason. And when the prophet spoke the law against him, Herod therefore put him to death.

TERTULLIAN: Tertullian. We must now deal with the subject of marriage. Marcion, a heretic, more strict in self-control than the apostle, forbids it. The apostle Paul, although he prefers the grace of self-restraint, still allows people to enter into marriage and to enjoy it. He also advises staying in it rather than ending it. Christ clearly forbids divorce. Moses clearly allows it. Now, when Marcion completely forbids all sexual intercourse to the faithful, for we will say nothing about his catecumens, and when he commands the breaking off of all engagements before marriage, whose teaching does he follow, that of Moses or of Christ? Even Christ, however, when he commands here, the wife not to depart from her husband, or, if she depart, to remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband, both allowed divorce, which he never absolutely forbade, and confirmed the holiness of marriage. He did this by first forbidding its breaking apart. And if separation had happened, he wanted the marriage bond to be restored through reconciliation. This man ventured to talk to her about a marriage between them, which address, when she admitted, an agreement was made for her to change her habitation and come to him as soon as he should return from Rome. One article of this marriage also was this, that he should divorce Aretas's daughter. So Antipas, when he had made this agreement, sailed to Rome. But Herodias, their sister, was married to Herod, Philip, the son of Herod the Great, who was born of Mariamne, the daughter of Simon the high priest, who had a daughter, Salome, after whose birth Herodias took upon her to confound the laws of our country and divorced herself from her husband while he was alive and was married to Herod, Antipas, her husband's brother. Josephus, Antiquities of the Jews, translated by William Wiston, 1737, emphasis mine. Eusebius, Eusebius, recorded, not long after this John the Baptist was beheaded by the younger Herod, as is stated in the Gospels. Josephus also records the same fact, making mention of Herodias by name, and stating that although she was the wife of his brother, Herod made her his own wife after divorcing his former lawful wife, who was the daughter of Aretas, king of Petra, and separating Herodias from her husband while he was still alive.

ORIGEN: But maybe some Jewish man, one of those who dare to oppose the teaching of our Savior, will say this. He will say that when Jesus said, "Whoever puts away his own wife, except for the cause of fornication, makes her an adulteress." Jesus also gave permission to put away a wife, just as Moses did. Moses was said by him to have given laws because of the hardness of heart of the people. This man will also claim that the saying, "Because he found in her an unseemly thing," should be counted as the same as fornication. He will say that this is the reason why, with good cause, a wife could be sent away by her husband. But it must be said to him that if a woman who committed adultery was, according to the law, to be stoned, then clearly the unseemly thing is not meant in that sense. For it is not necessary, for adultery or any other great indecency like it, to write a bill of divorcement and put it into the hands of the wife. But perhaps Moses called every sin an unseemly thing. When the husband discovers such a thing in his wife, and she does not find favor in the eyes of her husband, the bill of divorcement is written, and the wife is sent away from the house of her husband. But from the beginning it has not been so.

HERMAS: and I said to him, "Sir, if anyone has a wife who trusts in the Lord, and if he finds out she is committing adultery, does the man sin if he keeps living with her?" And he said to me, "As long as he does not know about her sin, the husband does not commit any sin by living with her. But if the husband knows that his wife has gone astray, and if the woman does not repent, but keeps on in her sexual sin, and the husband still continues to live with her, then he also is guilty of her crime and shares in her adultery." And I said to him, "What then, sir, should the husband do if his wife continues in her filthy practices?" And he said, "The husband should send her away and live by himself. But if he sends his wife away and marries another, he also commits adultery." And I said to him, "What if the woman who is sent away repents and wants to return to her husband? Should her husband not take her back?" And he said to me, "Certainly. If the husband does not take her back, he sins and brings a great sin on himself. He should take back the sinner who has repented, but not over and over again. There is only one repentance for the servants of God. Therefore, if the divorced wife may repent, the husband should not marry another woman when his wife has been sent away. In this matter, man and woman must be treated exactly the same way. Also, adultery is not committed only by those who defile their bodies, but also by those who copy the actions of the pagans. Therefore, if anyone keeps doing such things and does not repent, stay away from him and stop living with him. Otherwise, you share in his sin. Therefore, this command has been given to you. You should remain by yourselves, both man and woman, because in such people repentance can take place." "But I do not," he said, "give an opportunity for doing these deeds. I want the one who has sinned to sin no more. But as for his earlier sins, there is one who is able to bring healing. It is he indeed who has power over all."

JUSTIN MARTYR: And the voice of the Gospel teaches even more strongly about sexual purity. It says, "Whoever marries a woman who is divorced from another husband commits adultery." And, "There are some who have been made eunuchs by men, and some who were born eunuchs, and some who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake, but not all can accept this saying." So, all who, by human law, are married a second time are, in the eyes of our Master, sinners. The same is true of those who look at a woman in order to lust after her. Because it is not only the person who actually commits adultery who is rejected by him; it is also the person who wants to commit adultery. Not only our actions, but also our thoughts, are open before God. And many people, both men and women, who have been Christ's disciples from childhood, remain pure at the age of sixty or seventy years. And I boast that I could produce such people from every race of men. What should I also say about the countless crowd of those who have changed their out-of-control habits and learned these things? Because Christ did not call the just or the sexually pure to repentance. He called the ungodly, the sexually immoral, and the unjust. His words are, "I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance." Because the Heavenly Father wants the sinner's repentance more than the sinner's punishment.

JUSTIN MARTYR: But if we marry, it is only so that we can raise children. Or if we choose not to marry, we live with self-control.

JUSTIN MARTYR: A certain woman lived with a husband who had no self-control. She herself had also once lived without self-control. But when she came to know the teachings of Christ, she became sober-minded. She tried to persuade her husband to live with self-control too. She quoted the teaching of Christ. She assured him that there will be punishment and eternal fire for those who do not live with self-control and in line with right reason. But he kept doing the same sinful excesses. By his actions, he pushed his wife away from him. She thought it was wicked to keep living as a wife with a husband who tried in every way to find chances to chase pleasure. He did this against the law of nature and against what is right. So she wanted to be divorced from him. Her friends persuaded her to stay with him. They advised her to keep living with him, thinking that sooner or later her husband might show hope of changing. So she went against her own feelings and stayed with him. But when her husband went to Alexandria and people reported that he was behaving worse than ever, she acted. She did not want to keep the marriage connection with him. She did not want to share his table and his bed and so become a partner in his wickedness and irreverence. So she gave him what you call a bill of divorce, and she separated from him. But this noble husband of hers did not respond as he should have. He should have been glad that she had stopped the actions she used to do without hesitation with servants and hired workers, back when she loved drunkenness and every vice. She had now given those things up. She also wanted him to give up the same things. Instead, when she left him without his wanting it, he brought an accusation against her. He claimed that she was a Christian. She presented a paper to you, the emperor. In it, she asked that first she be allowed to arrange her affairs and afterward to make her defense against the accusation once her affairs were in order. And you granted this. Her former husband, since he could no longer prosecute her, turned his attacks against a man named Ptolemaius. Urbicus punished him. Ptolemaius had been her teacher in the Christian doctrines.

JUSTIN MARTYR: And Joseph, the husband of Mary, wanted at first to send away Mary, who was engaged to him. He thought she was pregnant from having sex with a man, that is, from sexual sin. But in a vision, he was commanded not to send away his wife. The angel who appeared to him told him that what was in her womb is from the Holy Spirit. Then he was afraid, and he did not send her away.

THEOPHILUS OF ANTIOCH: After Adam was thrown out of Paradise, in that condition he knew Eve, his wife. God had formed her into a wife for him out of his rib. God did this, not as if he was unable to make his wife separately. Instead, God knew ahead of time that man would call on many gods. With this foreknowledge, God also knew that, through the serpent, error would bring in many gods that did not really exist, for there is only one God. Even then, error was trying to spread the idea of many gods, saying, "You shall be as gods." So, in case people might think that one God made the man and another made the woman, God made them both. God made the woman together with the man. He did this not only so that the mystery of God's one rule might be shown, but also so that their love for each other might be greater. So Adam said to Eve, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh." Also, he spoke like a prophet, saying, "For this cause shall a man leave his father and his mother and shall cleave to his wife, and they two shall be one flesh." And this also is fulfilled in us. For who that marries lawfully does not set aside mother and father in all family ties in the whole household, and instead hold close to his own wife and become one with her, lovingly choosing her first. So often, for the sake of their wives, some even submit to death.

THEOPHILUS OF ANTIOCH: And the one who marries, says the Gospel, a woman who is divorced from her husband commits adultery, and whoever divorces his wife, except for the reason of sexual immorality, causes her to commit adultery. Because Solomon says, "Can a man take fire into his chest and his clothes not be burned, or can someone walk on hot coals and his feet not be burned?" So the one who goes into a married woman will not be innocent.

ATHENAGORAS: Therefore, because we have the hope of eternal life, we look down on the things of this life, even the pleasures of the soul. Each of us considers as his wife the woman he has married according to the laws we have laid down, and we do this only for the purpose of having children. For just as a farmer throws seed into the ground and waits for the harvest, and does not keep sowing more on it, so for us, having children is the limit of how far we allow ourselves to indulge our appetite. In fact, you would find many among us, both men and women, who grow old without marrying. They do this in hope of living in closer communion with God. But if staying a virgin and living in the state of a eunuch brings a person nearer to God, while giving in to sexual thoughts and desires leads a person away from Him, then in the cases where we avoid the thoughts, we reject the actions even more. So we focus our attention not on studying words but on showing and teaching actions. A person should either remain as he was born or be content with one marriage. For a second marriage is only a deceptive adultery. For whosoever puts away his wife, he says, and marries another, commits adultery. He does not allow a man to send away the wife whose virginity he has ended, and he does not allow him to marry again. For the man who separates himself from his first wife, even if she is dead, is an adulterer in disguise. He resists the hand of God because in the beginning God made one man and one woman, and he breaks apart the strictest union of flesh with flesh, which was formed for the intercourse of the human race.

IRENAEUS: Irenaeus. That Samaritan woman who was in error did not stay with one husband; instead, she committed fornication by entering into many marriages.

TATIAN: Then he got up from there and went to the borders of Judea, beyond the Jordan. Large crowds came to him from there, and he healed them. He also taught them as he usually did. The Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked him, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" He said, "What did Moses command you?" They said, "Moses allowed us, saying, 'Whoever wants to, let him write a certificate of divorce and divorce his wife.'" Jesus answered them and said, "Have you not read, 'He who made them from the beginning made them male and female'?" And said, "For this reason the man will leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two will be one body. So then they are not two, but one body. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate." Those Pharisees said to him, "Why did Moses allow that a man should give a certificate of divorce and divorce her?" Jesus said to them, "Because of the hardness of your hearts, Moses gave you permission to divorce your wives. But from the beginning it was not so. I say to you, whoever divorces his wife without fornication and marries another has exposed her to adultery." When he entered the house, his disciples asked him again about this. He said to them, "Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another has exposed her to adultery. And any woman who leaves her husband and becomes another's has committed adultery. And whoever marries a woman who is divorced has committed adultery." His disciples said to him, "If the case between the man and the woman is like this, it is not good for a man to marry." He said to them, "Not every man can accept this saying, except the one to whom it is given. There are eunuchs who were born that way from their mother's womb. There are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men. And there are eunuchs who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. He who is able to be content, let him be content."

CLEMENT OF ALEXANDRIA: Our view is that we welcome as blessed the choice to not marry for those to whom God has given this gift. We admire monogamy and the honor of being married only once. We believe we should share suffering with another person and bear one another's burdens. This is so that no one who thinks they stand securely will fall themselves. It is about a second marriage that the Apostle says, "If you burn, marry."

CLEMENT OF ALEXANDRIA: is it not possible to stay self-controlled even while married and not try to separate what God has joined together? That is the teaching of those who split apart the yoke of marriage. Because of them, the Christian name is spoken against. If these people who owe their own existence to sexual relations think that such relations are impure, then must they not be impure too? But I hold that even the seed of those who are made holy is holy. In us, it is not only the spirit that should be made holy; our behavior, our way of life, and our body should also be made holy. What does the Apostle Paul mean when he says that the wife is made holy by the husband and the husband by the wife? And what is the meaning of the Lord's words to those who asked about divorce? They asked whether it is lawful to send away one's wife, as Moses commanded. "Because of the hardness of your hearts," he says. Moses wrote this: "But have you not read that God said to the first man, 'You two shall be one flesh'? Therefore, he who divorces his wife, except for fornication, makes her an adulteress." On marriage.

CLEMENT OF ALEXANDRIA: About the words: Not all can receive this saying. There are some eunuchs who were born so, and some who were made eunuchs by men, and some who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let him receive it who can receive it. They do not understand the context. After he spoke about divorce, some people asked him whether, if that is the rule about a woman, it is better not to marry. Then the Lord said, "Not all can receive this saying, but those to whom it is granted." What the people asking the question wanted to know was this: When a man's wife has been condemned for fornication, is it allowed for him to marry another woman? Therefore, there is nothing praiseworthy about not marrying unless it comes from love for God. In any case, the Blessed Paul says about those who insult marriage: In the last times, some shall depart from the faith, turning to spirits of error and doctrines inspired by demons, forbidding to marry and commanding abstinence from food. And again he says, "Let no one disqualify you by demanding self-imposed ascetic practices and severe treatment of the body." And the same writer also says this: Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be separated from her. Are you free from any wife? Do not seek to find one. And again, "Let every man have his own wife, lest Satan tempt you on marriage."

CLEMENT OF ALEXANDRIA: But it is the same man and Lord who makes the old new. He does this by no longer allowing several marriages. At that time, God required it, when people had to increase and multiply. He also teaches one marriage. This is for the purpose of having children and taking care of the home. For this purpose, woman was given as a help meat. And if, out of compassion, the apostle allows a man a second marriage because he cannot control himself and burns with passion, that man also does not commit any sin according to the Old Testament. This is because it was not forbidden by the law. But he does not reach the higher perfection of the gospel ethic. But he gains heavenly glory for himself if he remains as he is. He keeps undefiled the marriage yoke that was broken by death. He also willingly accepts God's purpose for him. By this, he has become free from distraction for the service of the Lord. How then can marriage be a state only meant for ancient times, and an invention of the law, and marriage on Christian principles be of a different kind if we hold that the Old and the New Testaments proclaim the same God? For what God has joined together, no man may ever put asunder for any good reason. If the Father commanded this, then even more, the Son will keep it. On marriage.

CLEMENT OF ALEXANDRIA: But to shame and discourage those who are leaning toward a second marriage, the Apostle rightly uses strong words. He says right away: "Every other sin is external to the body, but he who commits fornication sins against his own body." But if anyone dares to call marriage fornication, that person, again, falls into blasphemy against the law and the Lord. For just as covetousness is called fornication because it goes against being content with what a person has, and just as idolatry is leaving the one God to embrace many gods, so fornication is turning away from one marriage to several.

TERTULLIAN: Tertullian. Now, if any limit is set on marrying, such as the spiritual rule that allows only one marriage under Christian obedience, supported by the authority of the Paraclete, then it is his right to set that limit. He is the one who once allowed more freedom. It is his right to gather in what he once spread out. It is his right to cut down the tree that he planted. It is his right to reap the harvest that he sowed. It is his right to say, "It remains that they who have wives be as though they had none," because he once said, "Be fruitful and multiply." The end belongs to the one to whom the beginning belonged. Still, the tree is not cut down as if it deserved blame. The grain is not reaped as if it were being condemned. It is done simply because its time has come. In the same way, marriage does not need the hook and scythe of holiness, as if marriage were evil. Instead, it is like something that is ripe and ready to be released from its duty. It is ready for that holiness which, in the long run, will bring a rich crop by reaping it. This leads me to say something about Marcion's God. When he attacks marriage as an evil and unchased thing, he is really harming the cause of that very holiness that he seems to serve.

TERTULLIAN: Tertullian. The same one who brings us into the world must, of necessity, take us out of it too. Therefore, when, through the will of God, the husband has died, the marriage also, by the will of God, dies. Why should you restore what God has brought to an end? Why do you, by repeating the servitude of matrimony, reject the liberty that is offered to you? You have been bound to a wife, says the Apostle. Do not seek loosing. You have been loosed from a wife. Do not seek binding. For even if you do not sin by marrying again after death, he still says that pressure of the flesh ensues. Therefore, as far as we can, let us love the opportunity for self-restraint. As soon as it offers itself, let us decide to accept it. Then, what we did not have the strength to follow in matrimony, we may follow in widowhood. The occasion must be embraced, because it puts an end to what necessity commanded. How harmful to faith, and how blocking to holiness, second marriages are! The discipline of the Church, and the instruction of the Apostle declare: He does not approve of men who have been married twice presiding over a church. He would not allow a widow to enter the order unless she had been the wife of one man. For God's altar ought to be presented as pure.

TERTULLIAN: Tertullian. One reason that set the rule from the beginning and moved God's will to forbid divorce is this fact: anyone who sends away his wife except because of fornication makes her commit adultery. And anyone who marries a woman who was sent away by her husband, of course, commits adultery. A divorced woman cannot even marry in a lawful way. And if she does anything like that without the name of marriage, does it not still count as adultery? That is because adultery is a crime that copies the way marriage works. And the reason why he has done away with divorce, which was not from the beginning, is so that he may strengthen what was from the beginning, that is, the lasting joining together of two into one flesh. He does this so that no need or chance for a third union of flesh will break into his rule. He allows divorce for no reason but one, that is, only if the evil that people are trying to guard against has already happened. It is truly the case that divorce was not from the beginning. Among the Romans, it is not until after the six hundredth year from the building of the city that this kind of hard-heartedness is written down as having been done. But they allow themselves to commit many adulteries, even without divorcing their partners. For us, even if we do divorce them, marriage will not be lawful.

TERTULLIAN: Tertullian. She must keep living in peace with the man she will no longer have the power to divorce. Even if she had been able to divorce him, she would not have been able to marry again. Editor's note: The following quotation from Tertullian, Tertullian, was written during his Montanist phase. The Montanists did not allow second marriages after the death of a spouse. In this way, they went beyond the Scriptures. However, Tertullian made an exception for remarriage after death, only if the death of the first wife happened before the husband became a believer.

TERTULLIAN: Tertullian, you have been bound to a wife; do not seek to be released. You have been released from a wife; do not seek a wife. But if you take a wife, you have not sinned. Because for someone who, before believing, had been released from a wife, she will not be counted as a second wife. The wife who comes after believing is the first. This is because it is from the time of our believing that our life itself dates its origin.

MARK MINUCIUS FELIX: But we keep our modesty not just in how we look, but in our hearts. We gladly stay committed to the bond of one marriage. When it comes to wanting children, we recognize either one wife or none at all.

ORIGEN: After this, it is written that "there came to him the Pharisees, tempting him, and saying, 'Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?'" Mark also has written something like this: "So among those who came to Jesus and asked him questions, there were some who asked in order to tempt him." If our Savior, so far above all, was tempted, then which of his disciples, who is appointed to teach, needs to be upset when he is tempted by some who ask questions, not because they love learning, but because they want to tempt? You could find many passages, if you gather them, where the Pharisees tempted our Jesus. Others, different from them, also tempted him, like a certain lawyer and perhaps also a scribe. If you bring together what is said about those who tempted him, you can investigate and find what is useful for this kind of question. But the Savior, in answering those who tempted him, set down teachings. They said, "Is it lawful for a man to put away his own wife for every cause?" He answered and said, "Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female?" and so on. I think the Pharisees brought up this question for this reason, so they could attack him no matter what he said. For example, if he had said, "It is lawful," they would have accused him of breaking up marriages for small reasons. But if he had said, "It is not lawful," they would have accused him of allowing a man to live with a woman even when there are sins. In the same way, with the tribute money, if he had told them to give it, they would have accused him of making the people subject to the Romans and not to the law of God. But if he had told them not to give it, they would have accused him of starting war and rebellion and of stirring up people who could not stand against so powerful an army. But they did not understand how he answered without blame and with wisdom. First, he rejected the idea that a wife should be put away for every cause. Second, he answered the question about the bill of divorce. He saw that not every cause is a reasonable reason to end a marriage. He also saw that the husband must live with the wife as with the weaker vessel, giving her honor and carrying her burdens in sins. And by what is written in Genesis, he put to shame the Pharisees who boasted in the scriptures of Moses. He said, "Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female?" and so on. Then he added, "Because of the saying, 'And the two shall become one flesh,' and taught in agreement with one flesh, namely, so that they are no more two, but one flesh." And to persuade them that they should not put away their wife for every cause, it is said, "What God has joined together, let not man put asunder." And it is God who has joined the two together into one, so that they are no more two, from the time the woman is married to the man. And since God has joined them together, for this reason, in the case of those who are joined together by God, there is a gift. Paul knew this, that marriage according to the word of God was a gift, just as holy celibacy was a gift. So he says, "But I would that all men were like myself; howbeit, each man has his own gift from God, one after this manner and another after that." And those who are joined together by God both think about and keep the command, "Husbands, love your wives," as Christ also the Church. The Savior then commanded, "What God has joined together, let not man put asunder." But man wants to put apart what God has joined together when? Falling away from the sound faith, giving heed to seducing spirits and doctrines of demons, through the hypocrisy of men that speak lies, branded in their own conscience as with a hot iron, forbidding, not only to commit fornication, but to marry. He breaks apart even those who had been joined together before by the providence of God. Let these things be said, keeping in mind what is clearly said about the male and the female, and the man and the woman, as the Savior taught in his answer to the Pharisees.

ORIGEN: ORIGEN. Some of the laws in the Old Testament were written not as the best laws, but to fit the weakness of the people who received the law. Something like this is shown in the words: "Moses, for your hardness of heart allowed you to put away your wives." But what is higher and better than the law that was written for their hardness of heart is shown in this: "But from the beginning it has not been so." But in the New Covenant also there are some legal commands of the same kind as: "Moses, for your hardness of heart allowed you to put away your wives." For example: "Because of our hardness of heart it has been written because of our weakness." But because of fornications: "Let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband." And also this: "Let the husband render to the wife her due, and likewise also the wife to the husband." To these sayings it is then added: "But this I say by way of permission, not of commandment." And this also: "A wife is bound for so long time as her husband lives; but if her husband is dead, she is free to be married to whom she will, only in the Lord." Was said by Paul because of our hardness of heart and weakness. He said it to those who do not want to strongly desire the greater gifts and become more blessed. But now, even though what was written says otherwise, some even of the rulers of the church have allowed a woman to marry even when her husband was still living. They are doing the opposite of what was written, where it says: "A wife is bound for so long time as her husband lives," and: "So then, if while her husband lives, she shall be joined to another man she shall be called an adulteress."

ORIGEN: Our Savior says this: He does not allow the breaking up of marriages for any sin except fornication alone, when it is found in the wife. Whoever shall put away his own wife, except for the cause of fornication, makes her an adulteress. But someone might ask a question about this: Because of this teaching, does He stop anyone from putting away a wife, unless she is caught in fornication, even for any other reason? For example, what if she tried to poison someone? Or what if, while her husband was away from home, she killed an infant born to them? Or what if she committed any kind of murder at all? And further, if she were found stripping the house of her husband and stealing from it, even though she was not guilty of fornication, someone might ask whether He could rightly send her away. After all, the Savior forbids anyone to put away his own wife except for the cause of fornication. In either case, something seems shocking. Whether it is truly shocking, I do not know. To endure sins that are so terrible and that seem worse than adultery or fornication will seem unreasonable. But on the other hand, everyone would admit that acting against the purpose of the Savior's teaching is sinful, so I wonder why He did not say, "Let no one put away his own wife except for the cause of fornication," but instead says, "Whoever shall put away his own wife except for the cause of fornication makes her an adulteress." Clearly, the man who puts away his wife when she is not a fornicator makes her an adulteress, as far as it depends on him. For if, when the husband is living, she shall be called an adulteress if she be joined to another man, then when he puts her away, he gives her an excuse for a second marriage. In this way, he very plainly makes her an adulteress. But whether catching her in the act of poisoning or committing murder gives him any defense for dismissing her, you can ask yourselves. The husband can also, in other ways, besides putting her away, cause his own wife to commit adultery. For example, he might let her do whatever she wants beyond what is proper. He might also allow her to form close friendships with whatever men she wants. Often, because husbands are too trusting, these wrong steps happen to wives. But whether such husbands have any defense or not in cases like these, you should examine carefully. You should also give your opinion about the hard questions we have raised from this passage. Even the man who keeps himself from his wife often makes her an adulteress when he does not satisfy her desires. He may do this while seeming to be more serious and self-controlled, and perhaps this man deserves more blame. As far as it depends on him, he makes her an adulteress by not satisfying her desires. This may be worse than the man who, for a reason other than fornication, has sent her away, for poisoning or murder or any of the most terrible sins. But just as a woman is an adulteress, even if she seems to be married to a man while her former husband is still living, so also the man who seems to marry a woman who has been put away does not really marry her. Instead, according to what our Savior says, he commits adultery with her. After these things, consider how many possible troubles can happen in marriages. A man might have to endure them and suffer very great hardships. Or if he does not endure them, he may break the word of Christ. Because of this, the disciples say to him. They take refuge in celibacy as easier and more practical than marriage, even though marriage seems useful. They say, "If the case of the man is so with his wife, it is not expedient to marry." And the Savior said this, teaching us that complete chastity is a gift given by God. It is not only the result of training; it is given by God through prayer. All men cannot receive the saying, but they to whom it is given. Now, since some people make a tricky argument against the words, "to whom it is given," as if those who wanted to stay pure in celibacy but were overcome by their desires had an excuse, we must say this: If we believe the Scriptures, why do we hold on to the words, "but they to whom it is given"? But stop paying attention to this. Ask, and it shall be given you. And also, what is added: "For everyone that asks receives." For if those to whom it is given can receive this teaching about complete purity, then the person who wants it should ask. He should obey and believe him who said, "Ask, and it will be given to you." And he should not doubt the words, "Everyone that asks receives." But you may ask who it is that truly asks. For no one who does not receive has really asked, even if he seems to have asked. It is not allowed to say that the words, "Everyone that asks receives," are a lie. So who is the one who asks? It is the one who has obeyed Jesus when he says, "If you stand praying, believe that you receive, and you will receive." But the one who asks must do everything in his power so that he may pray with the Spirit, and pray also with the understanding, and pray without ceasing. He must also remember the saying, "And he spoke a parable to them to the end that they ought always to pray, and not to faint, saying, There was in a city a judge," and so on. And it is useful to know what it means to ask, and what it means to receive, and what is meant by "Everyone that asks receives," and by, "I say to you, though he will not rise and give him, because he is his friend, yet because of his importunity, he will arise and give him as many as he needs." So it is added, "And I say to you, ask, and it shall be given you," and so on. Further, let the words, "All men cannot receive the saying, but they to whom it is given," push us to ask in a way that is worthy of receiving. And also, let this saying push us: "What son is there of you who shall ask his father for a fish? Will he, for a fish, give him a serpent?" and so on. Therefore, God will give the good gift, complete purity in celibacy and chastity, to those who ask him with their whole soul, with faith, and in prayers without ceasing.

CYPRIAN: Cyprian. Hold on tight, you virgins. Hold on to what you have begun to be. Hold on to what you will be. A great reward is waiting for you. A great repayment for virtue is waiting for you. Chastity has a huge benefit. Do you want to know what troubles the virtue of self-control avoids, and what good it has? "I will multiply," God says to the woman, "your sorrows and your groanings; and in sorrow you shall bring forth children, and your desire shall be to your husband, and he shall rule over you." You are free from this sentence. You do not fear the sorrows and the groans of women. You do not fear giving birth. Your husband is not Lord over you. Instead, your Lord and Head is Christ. He is like the man, and He stands in the man's place. Your share and your condition are equal with those of men. It is the word of the Lord that says, "The children of this world beget and are begotten. But they who are counted worthy of that world, and of the resurrection from the dead, neither marry nor are given in marriage; neither shall they die any more, for they are equal to the angels of God, being the children of the resurrection." What we will be. You have already begun to be. You already have, in this world, the glory of the resurrection. You go through the world without the sickness of the world. Because you remain chaste and virgins, you are equal to the angels of God. Only let your virginity remain and last, real and unharmed. As it began bravely, let it keep going without stopping. Do not look for the decorations of necklaces or fancy clothes, but for the beauty of good conduct. Let it look toward God and heaven. Do not lower your eyes, which are lifted to things above, down to the lust of the flesh and of the world. Do not set them on earthly things. The first command ordered people to increase and multiply. The second command urged self-control. While the world was still rough and empty, we were spread by the fruitful having of many children. We increased to grow the human race. But now, when the world is full and the earth is supplied, those who can accept self-control live like eunuchs. They make themselves eunuchs for the kingdom. The Lord does not command this, but He encourages it. He does not force a yoke of necessity on anyone, because free choice of the will is left. As we have borne the image of Him who is earthy, let us also bear the image of Him who is heavenly. Virginity bears this image. Integrity bears it. Holiness bears it. And truth. Ways of life that remember God bear it. They keep righteousness together with true religion. They stay firm in faith. They are humble in fear. They are brave in every suffering. They are gentle when they must endure wrong. They are ready to show mercy. They are of one mind and one heart in brotherly and sisterly peace.

CYPRIAN: Marriage should not be made with Gentiles. In Tobias, take a wife from the seed of your parents, and do not take a strange woman who is not of the tribe of your parents. Also in Genesis, Abraham sends his servant to take Rebekah from his own family line for his son Isaac. Also in Ezra, it was not enough for God that the Jews were laid waste, unless they also left their foreign wives; they also left the children whom they had fathered by them. Also in the first epistle of Paul to the Corinthians, the woman is bound as long as her husband lives, but if he dies, she is free to marry whom she wants, only in the Lord. But she will be happier if she stays as she is. And again, do you not know that your bodies are the members of Christ? Shall I take the members of Christ and make them the members of a harlot? Far be it from me. Or do you not know that he who is joined together with a harlot is one body, for two shall be in one flesh; but he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit? Also in the second epistle to the Corinthians, do not be joined together with unbelievers. For what participation is there between righteousness and unrighteousness? Or what communication does light have with darkness? Also, concerning Solomon in the third book of Kings, and foreign wives turned away his heart after their gods.

CYPRIAN: A wife must not leave her husband, or if she does leave, she must remain unmarried. In the First Epistle of Paul to the Corinthians, "But to those who are married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not be separated from her husband; but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband, and the husband should not put away his wife."

NOVATIAN: The commands about chastity, brothers and sisters, are ancient. Why do I say ancient? Because they were established at the same time as human beings themselves. A woman has her own husband, so that besides him she may know no other; and the woman is given to the man so that when what was his own has been given to him, he should look for nothing that belongs to someone else. And in this way it is said, "Two shall be in one flesh." What has been made, one should come back together, so that a separation with no return would not give any opportunity to a stranger. So the apostle declares that the man is the head of the woman. He says this to recommend chastity in the joining of the two, just as a head cannot fit the limbs of another person, so a person's limbs cannot fit the head of another. A person's head matches that person's limbs, and that person's limbs match that person's head. The two are joined by a natural bond in shared agreement. This is so that, if any conflict comes from separating the members, the agreement of the divine covenant will not be broken. Yet he adds and says, "Because he who loves his wife loves himself; for no one hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, even as Christ the Church." From this passage there is strong authority for love together with chastity. Husbands are to love their wives even as Christ loved the Church, and wives ought to love their husbands in the same way the Church loves Christ. Christ gave this judgment when, being asked, he said that a wife must not be sent away, except for the cause of fornication. He placed such honor on chastity. From this came the command, "Do not allow an adulteress to live." From this the apostle says, "This is the will of God, that you abstain from fornication." From this he also says the same thing, "That the members of Christ must not be joined with the members of a harlot." From this the man is handed over to Satan for the destruction of the flesh. This is the man who tramples the law of chastity under his feet and practices the sins of the flesh. From this, and for good reason, adulterers do not receive the kingdom of heaven. From this it is that every sin is outside the body, but the adulterer alone sins against his own body. From this come other authoritative sayings of the teacher. It is not necessary to gather all of them right now, especially among you who for the most part know them and do them. And you cannot find a reason to complain about these things, even if they are not fully explained. For the adulterer has no excuse, and he could not have one, because he could take a wife. Laws are given to married women, who are so bound that, as a result, they cannot be separated.

LACTANTIUS: So that no one thinks he can limit God's commands, other commands are added. These take away all false accusations and any chance for cheating. A man is an adulterer if he marries a divorced woman, and a man who sends his wife away commits adultery, for God is not willing to separate the body.

LACTANTIUS: Therefore, let this be followed in all the duties of life; let it also be followed in marriage. It is not enough if you stay away from another person's bed or from the brothel. Let the man who has a wife look for nothing more. Being satisfied with her alone, let him keep the secrets of the marriage bed pure and undefiled. In God's sight, the man is just as much an adulterer and unclean if he throws off the yoke and lives in sexual sin with someone else. This is true, whether it is with a free woman or with a slave. But just as a woman is held by the bonds of chastity not to desire any other man, so the husband should be held by the same law. This is because God has joined the husband and the wife together in the union of one body. For this reason, He has commanded that the wife must not be sent away unless she is proven guilty of adultery. He has also commanded that the bond of the marriage agreement must never be broken unless unfaithfulness has broken it.