Discussion Jumpstarter
Study leader reference - not a definitive answer
Question 10
Clayton claimed “most Mennonite churches are not friendly churches,” gave the “Mennonites have eye problems” staring example, contrasted it with how Mormons “swarmed” visitors, and tied it to winsomeness, asking questions, and his mom’s warning: “People that you make fun of, you will never win for Jesus”; what concrete changes would have to happen in your congregation (after-service patterns, cliques, humor, listening) for strangers to feel honored as image-bearers rather than inspected as outsiders?
Another way to ask: What specific things would need to change in your church (how people greet, cliques, jokes, listening after service) so visitors feel respected and welcomed, not stared at or treated like outsiders?
Discussion Jumpstarter
Direct Answer
Based on the speaker’s teaching, concrete change would mean replacing staring and cliques with deliberate welcome, listening, and respectful speech—because mocking, ignoring, or assuming things about people works against winning them to Jesus. Strangers feel honored when a church practices winsomeness: noticing them, asking questions, and making space for them.
- Clayton states bluntly: “Most Mennonite churches are not friendly churches…not welcoming churches,” and visitors are “completely ignored.”
- He reports the repeated complaint: “Mennonites have eye problems…They just stare at you.”
- He contrasts with the Mormon church: “everybody…came to say hi…they swarmed us to make us feel welcome…Please come again.”
- He identifies a needed after-service pattern: “service is over, stand up…get out of that clique,” instead of only talking to your usual group.
- He stresses listening: a woman told him, “you’re the only one…that actually will sit and listen to me.”
- He ties outreach to speech and humor: “People that you make fun of, you will never win for Jesus,” including jokes that “put…races…genders” down.